Another numerical palindrome.

31213. Saw it on the drive home tonight.
Man. I'm putting some miles on my little truck.

A Hiatus

Vacation apparently does something for me when it comes to new posts.

I noticed a friend of mine added a song as a favorite on Pandora the other day... or rather, I noticed on Facebook that a friend had noted a song in Pandora's add on... whatever.

Tonight, although I need to head to bed, I'm going to talk about this song...

The band is called Cartel. The song is called "The Minstrel's Prayer."

and all these stupid silly songs
keep trying to catch your ear
i'm trying desperately
it's just so hard to persevere
and even if you listened
i never had much to say
cause it's the same old song
i've written for the day

shelter me oh genius words
just give me strength
just to pen these things
and give me peace to well her wings
and oh carry on all you
minstrels of the world
we will catch our ladies ear
we will win for us the girl

all these minstrels through the ages
that is really all we are
simply singing for the girl
that makes us try so very hard
to craft the perfect limerick
to wield unending woe
to write such silly songs
and the difference never know

shelter me oh genius words
just give me strength
just to pen these things
and give me peace to well her wings
and oh carry on all you
minstrels of the world
we will catch our ladies ear
we will win for us the girl

and i'll hold on to the dream
of this beggar's plea and
optimistic fantasy
just hold the hand and drop the knee
you're facing love
you're embracing melody

shelter me oh genius words
just give me strength
just to pen these things
and give me peace to well her wings
and oh carry on all you
minstrels of the world
we will catch our ladies ear
we will win for us the girl

and oh carry on, oh carry
on all you minstrels of
the world
we will catch our ladies ear
we will win for us the girl

I tried to find the song for you to listen along, but had no luck. You could probably get a good idea on iTunes, though.

First off, I love the kick drum.

Okay, moving on.

The thought that this song gave me is mimicry. We've probably all seen children try to do things exactly like their parents. I remember trying to push our lawnmower when I was little. I could only reach the cross brace, and that didn't have the kind of leverage one needs to push a mower.

So, anyway, back to mimicry. The minstrel. He writes and sings to win her heart.

But where did he learn? What is it that he copies?

I would put forward the notion that the minstrel is trying to be like the Father. The Father has written a beautiful song to win his girl. He has humbled himself. He has sung the song for her.

We are her. It is for us to face love and embrace His melody.

He still sings.

The lyrics still resonate.

Father, catch your lady's ear,
Win for us, the girl.

Shivering cold in August.

It's Monday night, and the original plan was for me to head up to the airport tomorrow to catch a flight back into Houston tomorrow. 

A little tropical storm had other plans for me.

It looks like I'll get to stay an extra night here in Albuquerque with my friends Aaron and Meredith. 

For the most part, we laid pretty low today. Aaron and I grilled some steaks that we had seasoned with some salt and pepper, garlic, olive oil, and fresh thyme from the garden. We also grilled up some red corn with green chiles wrapped around each ear. Meredith cooked some fresh green beans and baked this incredible homemade pie from scratch... it had berries, strawberries, apples, manna...

It was good.

To say we laid low all day would be, well, incorrect. The truth of the matter is that I saw more of Albuquerque today than I think I ever have.

After dinner we drove up to Sandia Crest, elevation 10,678 feet. We made it up there just as the sun was setting, but the sunset (or what we saw of it) wasn't that impressive. However, there was a storm rolling in. Dark thunder heads in the last light of day provided some great photos. Lightning in the clouds was also a nice effect on some of those long exposure shots.

Aaron and I both took photos of the city lit up that we are pretty proud of. 

I took pictures up there till my battery on my camera was almost dead.

We decided to head back down the mountain as it started to lightly rain. However, before we could leave, we noticed three teenagers (I'm guessing at their age) arrive near the parking area at the crest with flashlights. It was late, and the little concession stand/store was closed.

I asked if they needed anything, perhaps to borrow a phone to make a call. (Our ride was pretty tight already with the 3 of us adults and the baby in her car seat).

"Do you have anything to drink?"

"Yeah... I think we might."

I checked the front seat of the car, and a bottle of water that I had bought Saturday for our trip to Santa Fe was still laying in the front seat floor unopened. 

"Here you go, I bought this the other day, and never even opened it. God is good. Do you have someone coming to pick you up?"

"Yes."

With little else said, I wished them good luck and good night, and met up with Aaron and Meredith in the car.

It was an interesting drive down the mountain.

Oh, and we ate some of that pie a la mode when we got home. Aaron had to give Meredith a back rub it was so good. He would have probably done it anyway, but, man... that pie was good.

10:28 PM

Aaron and Meredith called it a night about half and hour ago.

The baby had kept them up for a while early this morning.

I checked out Desert Springs Church in Albuquerque this morning. It was good stuff. Oddly, the pastor reminds me of Austin Powers... and he was teaching on the marriage bed today... that means shagging, baby, yeah.

Anyway...

Yesterday we made the trek from Albuquerque to Santa Fe, and took the exit for Old Pecos Trail off of I-25. We turned toward town, then quickly turned north onto Old Las Vegas Highway. After about 5 miles of scraggly pinon bushes, dirt, and rock... suddenly, there it was on our left.

Bobcat Bite.

It tasted like grilled nostalgia... with cheese and green chiles.

Here's the crazy deal. We got there at 1:45 or so. We didn't get a seat until almost 2:30 maybe.

We didn't get our food until almost 2:50.

And we loved it.

Between the way you show up and write your name and party size on a white board yourself, slowly watching yourself move higher and higher on the list as other parties are seated, and actually getting into the restaurant (which feels like it may be 15' x 40') to order and then waiting for your burger to come out...

Well, it's an amazing burger.

Here's another thing: Aaron and I used to come to Bobcat's back when we worked at a summer camp and ate the same weekly rotating meals in the cafeteria.

"What's for lunch today?"

"Chicken-fried beige something."

"Again? I thought that was yesterday."

"No. That was chicken-fried beige something-else."

Now, by that comparison, a kick in the face may taste better. (Although, there was a meal we called shoe-leather steak...). But Bobcat Bite is nationally recognized as being a damned good burger. But there was something more to it, and there still is.

Those days busting our tails, working for chump change at camp were a ton of fun, and I wouldn't trade them for anything. Bobcat's was like the top of a loop on the wild ride that was those summers.

Later we made it up to the old camp ground. We saw the room we used to work in.

Bittersweet. Things change. You can't really go back. (Although I did try to help fix a display issue on the lighting console, to no avail).

We said hello and visited with some old friends, then made our way out and back toward Santa Fe.

Passing Bobcat's, we noticed that the line was much shorter for dinner. They may have already been closed, though, and just finishing serving those folks who had been the last in line.

We ended up at Harry's Roadhouse (also on Old Vegas) and got a seat in the orange room just off of the bar. I have yet to eat in every room at Harry's. I think it may become a goal in life. (It's good to have goals, right?).

The bread they serve while you are waiting on your dinner is crazy-good.

But that isn't the best part.

I had the strawberry rhubarb pie a la mode.

You can start envying me... now.

Seriously, this stuff can make you smile when you are in a bad bad mood.

Aaron snapped a picture of me eating some of this... ambrosia.

It's my profile picture on Facebook now.

Today after church we met up with my cousin who also lives in ABQ. We hung out for a while at his game shop, Ninja Monkey Gaming Center, then headed over to a local Dion's for an incredibly good pizza.

The night ended with Aaron, Meredith and I sitting on their porch... listening to a light rain falling, the sound of drops falling through leaves in the garden just off the porch, with voices like Harry Connick Jr, Frank, Michael Buble, Madeleine Peyroux, and others singing softly from the iPod. Aaron helped me figure out my way around my new Canon digital camera I got Thursday before coming out here.

He had left for church around 6:30 this morning, and was quite ready for bed by about 10 PM.

I sat, listening to the dark... raindrops lightly falling on the roof, the grass, the porch, the tomatoes, the basil...

The last few days have been great.

I'm sorry this little essay can't fully take you to the places I've been in the last few days, to show you the things I've seen, taste the things I've tasted (btw, Chama River has a Smokey flavored brew. It's really good stuff. It goes down perhaps... a little too easy), and feel the way I have with friends close to your heart, places that stir a thousand memories, and food that makes your taste buds and belly almost as happy as they make your heart.

I wish I could write that for you.

Anyway, it's 11:03 now, and the laptop's battery is in the red. Thanks all, I hope you get to feel the way I've felt the last couple of days sometime very soon.

New Mexican Food.

I arrived in Albuquerque yesterday afternoon. Last night I ate chicken enchiladas with green chiles and a fried eggs, with rice and beans (of course) at Garduno's. There should be a tilde over the "n" in that, but I don't know how to make one in this editor.

Oh well.

I'm not going to worry over it.

Sitting last night on Campbell's porch... cigar smoke lingering in the cool dry air...
Oil lamps flickering on the table... the warmth of Irish whiskey in going down my throat...
Talking about times we had thousands of days ago.

This morning we sat on the porch drinking lattes. Aaron and Meredith worked in the garden a bit picking peppers, cherry tomatoes you could eat like they were grapes, while I held baby Abigail in the shade.

Today lunch will be at Bobcat Bite, then on to Glorieta to see folks.

Short of some anxiety at the airport yesterday... this has already been an awesome weekend... and it's not even lunch time yet on Saturday morning.

Amusement.

Yesterday on my drive home, something occurred to me.

It amuses me (in some small way) when the mileage on my vehicle is a palindrome.

24342.

I know.

Insightful.

DCFC: I will possess your heart.

First, you need to be familiar with the Death Cab for Cutie's song "I will possess your heart." (You can hear a short version here, or watch their video (which is a bit longer) here).

Here's the lyrics if you're into that sort of thing...

How I wish you could see the potential,
the potential of you and me
It's like a book elegantly bound,
but in a language that you can't read - just yet
You gotta spend some time--love,
you gotta spend some time with me
And I know that you'll find--love,
I will possess your heart (x2)


There are days when outside your window,
I see my reflection as I slowly pass
And I long for this mirrored perspective,
when we'll be lovers, lovers at last
You gotta spend some time--love,
you gotta spend some time with me
And I know that you'll find--love,
I will possess your heart(x2)

I will possess your heart (x2)

You reject my advances and desperate pleas
I won't let you, let me down so easily, so easily

You gotta spend some time--love,
you gotta spend some time with me
And I know that you'll find--love,
I will possess your heart (x3)

I will possess your heart (x2)

The first time I heard this, to be honest, it came off as a bit... stalkerish.

For all I know, perhaps it was written to be that way.

But there is one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all. Sometimes he has something else to say in the midst of where we are.

It's like a hidden message of the gospel. When we are first presented with it, we may see it as

beautiful,

mysterious,

confusing,

un-wanted,

un-needed,

intrusive.

(Did I just have a kind of Mike Myers So I Married An Axe Murderer thing going there for a bit... (I couldn't find the rooftop poem... sorry.)?)

Anyway, back on track...

It has something in it that makes me think about "taste and see"...

It also made me think of Irresistible Grace... that Jesus Christ, the pursuer of our hearts, will win our affections, that the heart we try to hide from him, actually longs to be unfurled before him.

Even we as "Christ followers" have times where we "reject [his] advances and desperate pleas", but he doesn't give up on us. Alfred Edersheim in his book, "The Temple: It's Ministry and Services," refers to a story passed down from the rabbis:

For three years and a half abode the Shechinah' (or visible Divine presence) 'on the Mount of Olives,'— whether Israel would repent—'and calling upon them, "Seek ye the Lord while He may be found, call upon Him while He is near." And when all was in vain, then the Shechinah returned to its own place!

Another thought, "will" is a form of the verb "be"... which shares a form with the word "am".

I am.

Hmmm.

Anyway, that's about all I have for this one... for now.

Have you spent some time, love?
Have you spent some time... with Me?
I know that you'll find love...

and...

...I will possess your heart.

Falling Down

We are all apt to believe what the world believes about us.
George Eliot (1819 - 1880)

Have you heard the song "Falling Down," by Atreyu? Driving home from work Thursday night this song came on the radio. I'd heard it before, but that night it caught my ear a bit more than usual.

I've had some time to think about what I wanted to say about this song, and keep going between a few different(?) themes...

1. I'm falling down... We're all dying in the end.

The idea of depravity and death in sin was one of the first thoughts that came to mind when reflecting on this song.

2. It's in your head... All the voices mistaken. (Shake it off, shake it off).

Donald Miller has a book called "Searching For God Knows What," in which there is a bit about a lifeboat and the way that we as humans think that the size of the lifeboat is smaller than it really is, that it won't last, and that we try to justify why we should stay in, and others should give up their spot in the boat. I'd go into it a bit more, but I don't want to spoil that chapter for you. This book is worth the read.

2.5. What are the voices in your head?

When I came in the that night (or maybe it was the next morning), I saw the quote by Eliot. "We are all apt to believe what the world believes about us." Amazing quote, given the timing of it. Did you know that ol' George's real name was really Mary Ann Evans, and that she published under a man's pen name so that her work would be taken seriously in her day?

I found it interesting that the opening lines of the song were:

"You're always looking back / Running from the past / You're always sweating me / About the next big heart attack / You're always looking over you're shoulder / Staring down the path / I'm falling down, falling down, falling down"

Notice that it's "you" telling "me" about what to worry about, though "you" are "looking over your shoulder"... Something comes to mind about logs and splinters, and eyes.

The voices are, all to often, mistaken. They can be loud, however.

Do you hear the cries of "failure" and "@#$% up" louder than you hear the voice saying "My son. My daughter."? Can you hear the Father calling you a child of the king, or do you hear what a lost world is telling you that you have to worry about?

I'm still not sure I've unearthed everything that is hiding in my mind about the correlation between this song and this quote. I think that I'll go ahead and publish and come back to this some other time, perhaps.

Thoughts?

Graphics

I've been working at updating the header graphic for the blog. It's mostly what I had up before... before it randomly disappeared.

It kind of strikes me that sometimes work, and jobs, can be a bit like dating. With work, sometimes you can go quite a ways with a small or, rather, unengaging project. However, as soon as things may pick up a bit, several other projects will be vying for your attention.

When I took this job back at the end of January, a company I had interviewed with several times finally called to offer a job.

When it rains, it pours, I suppose.

What's the forecast?

Camp.

Running sound for a yearbook camp this week.

I never thought about there being a camp for yearbooks.

Looking around, there are kids here from what looks like junior high and high schools. Today is the first day of camp. We are still in the first real session.

This one is on themes. They are currently talking about coming up with themes, and theme spin-offs.

It strikes me as "how to be creative." I know that it isn't, but it's close. They are teaching brainstorming for concepts, building themes off of that, and how to prepare that for application across the yearbook.

I'm sure that at some point I had something like this in a classroom, once upon a time... but I can't remember it.

This could be long. It might be interesting.

The weekend...

What a weekend!

I made the trip from Houston down to Corpus Christi for Mother's Day. I mowed the yard, grilled some steaks, pork ribs, and chicken breasts. Mom and Dad shouldn't have to cook for most of the week. I also helped Mom order a new laptop. I'm disappointed that I couldn't convince her to go Mac.

If we would call the weekend those hours between going to our jobs, my weekend ended today (Monday) at noon. In that time, I received two phone calls informing me of different friends/acquaintances passing away.

One was a little girl from the church I used to work for. She had been fighting a brain tumor since last August. She was in kindergarten. I got that call Saturday night.

The other was a friend of mine from high school, a few years younger than I. There was a car wreck. That call came in today at about 11:55 AM. I was just getting to the office.

What a weekend to lose such wonderful people. To Ali Christian and Mrs Bigbee, I pray for your comfort and peace in the loss of your children.

Revisiting...

So, the other day I was on IM later than I should have been... and after that, I couldn't really get to sleep.

I just wasn't tired.

I picked up on a project that I hadn't gotten around to for over a month. All that was needed was an artistic review and criticism... the constructive kind, not the "this is why this is terrible" criticism.

A day or two later, I looked over the response email... and the quoted text. Here's what I take away from that:

If I send you an email with a time stamp after... I dunno, let's say midnight (this one was probably around 2 AM)... There are going to be typos. It will also tend toward the flow of conscientiousness style of writing... ie, I'll probably be close to rambling on-topic.

That's about it.

I am using Jott messaging,...

I am using Jott messaging, and it's ability to write to my blog. I'm still testing out its capabilities to accurately transcribe what I say, so now and then there is an odd word that gets in there... (This post and the previous one I've had to go in and edit a bit...)

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So that toll way, while...

So the toll way, while in the morning a royal pain because of all the traffic... When your driving home at 2 AM... There's hardly a car in sight. It's a tough time to get off work but it's a great time for the commute.

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Who's afraid?

I subscribe to a weekly newsletter called Monday Morning Memo by Roy H. Williams.

Recently, while listening to the podcast version of the newsletter, I heard the following:

I take a breath and close my eyes and remember the words of Marcus Aurelius Antoninus published 1800 years ago, “Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present.”

Anthony Hopkins shared a similar thought with James Lipton during a recent interview on Inside the Actor's Studio, “Today is the tomorrow I was so worried about yesterday.”

Another author that I have enjoyed is Frank Herbert who wrote the books of Dune. In it there is a passage often repeated called the Litany Against Fear:

I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.

The Book of Proverbs says this:

For as he thinks within himself, so he is.

The man described in the passage isn't the kind of guy you want to follow after, but the idea of what the man thinks of himself, he is, is an interesting idea that has presented itself to me several times over the last few weeks. Robert Kiyosaki in his "Rich Dad, Poor Dad," book speaks of his rich dad saying things like "I'm rich, and the rich don't do things like this," and "I'm broke right now, I'm not poor," (more or less).
It's setting your mind to something. Williams points out in his memos and books that we have exponentially more synapses and nerve connections in our minds than we do in our sensory organs, and goes on to say that we can experience a more convincing reality in our minds than we can in, well, reality.

I am in shape and quite well off.

I date amazing women.

I'll fill you in on how this goes.

0 to 60

2 weeks ago, I was getting pretty bummed. I had been doing some design work, making some money, trying to find something full time... and the lack of response was getting... depressing.

Then I got a call. 3 days later I was up in Houston for an interview.

The following Monday, I had an invitation to a second interview on Thursday.

Thursday I was offered a job.

Today is Tuesday. I start work next Friday.

Here's the fun part. I have some of my belongings here in Corpus Christi. Most of my things are hanging out in a 10x10 storage unit just south of Hot Springs, Arkansas. I haven't found a place to live in Houston yet, although I do have family that have offered temporary housing (which is seriously keeping me from freaking out right about now).

So, most things are going good. I did, however, get a jury duty summons for Corpus Christi for the Monday after I start work in Houston. Gotta get out of that.

There you go... The fan's on hi. The monkeys are aggrevated, well nourished, and typically regular.

An umbrella is advised for anyone wanting to come along for the ride.

Echoes from somewhere...

So, I'm not sure why my header is missing on my page.

But I'll get to that later.

So, I've been mainly in Corpus Christi since early November. I've had the chance to do some design work for a church in Columbus, Ohio that a friend of mine is pastoring, Discovery Church. I also did some tech work for another friend's church on the east side of Dallas.

I turned 30.

I've been interviewing for a few jobs. I'm doing some freelance. I'm staying busy.

I saw this on Bobby Chandler's Church-Hype Blog. Good stuff, Bobby, it reminds me of clientcopia.

I think I'll probably be posting more often starting soon, but I'm not certain on that.

Happy 2008, everyone.