Last Day.

Today was my last day at work. Thus begins the transition period where I find a new job.

How did I begin?

With a sandwich and a nap.

Please listen carefully...

It seems like you can't call anywhere anymore without getting a recording menu system.

I understand. It helps route calls to people who can be the most appropriate for answering a caller's inquiry.

What I don't get, is the ones that always start off:

"Please listen carefully as our menu options have changed."

Since when? When did they change? Do you think that I wrote down the numbers I dialed when I called 6 months ago? Do you think that I wrote down the numbers when I called last week?

And if I called an hour ago, even if I did write down the numbers for "yes, I would like the menu in English, I have a technical question, I have a gizmo model 4..." have you changed the menu system since then?

Think about the time and money you are wasting, phone menu recorders. If you are footing the bill (800 numbers)... it's costing you money to say "we have a menu, don't randomly mash numbers hoping for a favorable result, this isn't a skating video game." If you aren't footing the bill, and your customers are calling you on their dime... now you are just trying to waste their time and money dealing with a problem with your product or service.

If you have questions about this, call me. If you get my voicemail, press 1, unless the menu options have changed.

Murphy the Bastard

I read this the other day:

"Doctors, astronauts, and plumbers need training to do their jobs, but anyone with a copy of Publisher is a graphic designer."

You can find that and more over at this site:

http://www.murphys-laws.com/murphy/murphy-Graphic_Design.htm

It all closely ties in with this:

"..."Make something idiot-proof, and they will build a better idiot" or "The trouble with making something idiot proof is that idiots are so smart"."

You can find that quote over on wikipedia on the Murphy's Law article.

People make it really difficult to be nice.

"I can't edit this text."
"That's because I sent you a .jpg."
"?"

... or...

"I can't get this to print 4 up on a piece of Letter sized paper..."
"Well, your original request was for postcards that we would print 2 up."

... or...

"Can you just send that to me so that I can edit it?"
"Do you have Photoshop?"
"No."
"Then, probably not?"


Days like today make me want to go home and play games that feature explosions.

Visual Texture

If you've checked any of the reading list... I've been reading some books by Roy H. Williams, aka The Wizard of Ads. I'm currently on the third book in the series, Magical Worlds of the Wizard of Ads. These books, while focusing on advertising, speak very much about creativity and communication.

But what I want to mention today is the covers. They just look cool. The books themselves aren't all that long... a little over 200 pages each, but something about the cover of these books makes you feel like you are pulling some ancient tome off the shelf... or the coffee table. It really does just depends on where I set it down last.

They have this really old leather look to them... roughed up, soft, wrinkly. But they are just a slick cover.

But that visible texture does something to you... it shapes the way that you perceive the book.

Whoever said you can't judge a book by its cover was probably misquoted. We do judge books by their covers. We just shouldn't.

Sometimes you get what you expect. Sometimes we don't.

Pattern and texture are so critical to design.

And I'm not limiting that to print and web... there's decorating, fashion, speaking...

Even chrome has a texture.

It's slick.

Where to throw the bananas?

The last few weeks have been kind of crazy.

Some good friends of mine had their first child, a boy. It's pretty exciting.

Last weekend, another friend of mine got married. After a morning of plane rides from Little Rock to Lubbock, I arrived.

Highlights of the trip:

"Freebirds" for lunch on Friday. I haven't had Freebirds since last May when my brother graduated at TAMU.

Lunch on Saturday was at a little place called Tokyo (something something)... one of those places where they cook your food right in front of you... food was great, fun experience, way cheaper than I was expecting. Rock on.

Lunch Sunday was actually a little late, but who cares? I had Whataburger when we got back to Little Rock. We don't have Whataburgers in Arkansas. There is a What-A-Burger place a few hours from here, but it isn't the same thing, although I've heard the food there is great.

Hmm... these highlights are all around food. On a side note, my friend got married. Eventually, they made their way out of Plainview and on toward their honeymoon. Another highlight would have to be one of the best hugs I've had all year. Thanks to the lovely young lady from Lovington.

The problem with travel though is that it ends, and you come back to all the work you left, plus more.

It was good to see friends.

which is the lesser of two?

sometimes I think to myself... if only people understood what it is that I do.

other times... I think to myself... if people didn't assume they knew what it is that I do.

wedding dresses.

I have been involved in "church" since... I dunno... probably a few mornings after I was conceived.

I can't really remember a time that a church wasn't a part of my life.

It was 1995 when I got it. It was then that my heart understood what my head always had. It was like starting a new relationship.

I think it was 1996 or 1997 when I first began making signs and graphics for my college student ministry group. It was 1997 or 1998 when I made my first website. It was for a ministry.

It's now almost 12 years since that night at summer camp when my life changed. I've been on staff for a church since October 2004. My job is a little different.

This job has helped to hone what I think is a focus in my life right now:

The Church is described as the Bride of Christ. She deserves to be beautiful. He deserves for her to be beautiful. Too often, however, instead of a gorgeous bride, radiant and seductive, walking veiled down an aisle to her groom, she seems more like a kindergarten aged little girl, wearing her mother's shoes that are too large, and clothes grossly out of proportion. Instead of an vision of mystery, she is a sight of comedy.

I don't think she wants to be childish. She just is.

I hope that Christ's return is soon, but not too soon. I know that might sound bad.

"I love Jesus, but I don't want to see him any time soon."

It's not like that. Jesus tells a story of some young girls. Some have oil in their lamps and what for the "bridegroom" to return to the city, while some of the other girls do not have oil in their lamps. The groom returns late at night, and only half of the girls are prepared to light their lamps and find their way to the wedding party. The others are left out.

I don't want Jesus to come back yet because I'm afraid the Church still has a lot of growing up to do.

For me, I see the Church trying to use media to reach her own and reach the masses around her.

Unfortunately, many churches use Word clipart to look savvy.

The world around her employs designers to appear professional and to be taken seriously. The Church uses volunteers (NOT that there is anything wrong with volunteers, I love volunteers)... but they are not equipped. They are not aware that they should be like bridesmaids, attending the Bride's dress... her makeup... her flowers.

So, metaphorically, I see myself as a Bridesmaid. God has made me to do what I do very well, and for that I am thankful. I think it's because he wants me to use what I have been given to prepare his Son's Bride to see her Groom.

I want to make the Church look amazing.

I want your church to look amazing.

She deserves it...

...Because He deserves it.

Abracadbra

I've been reading "The Wizard of Ads," by Roy H. Williams. You can get his "Monday Morning Memo" for free on his site. It has great insights on advertising and marketing.

I do a lot of graphic design work. Print. Web. Video.

I hadn't really thought of myself as a marketer. I've had a couple of sales jobs in the past.

I hated them.

Sales jobs were always about trying to make the customer walk out having bought more than what they came in for.

"Would you like to sign up for AOL (now that you just spent a thousand bucks on a computer in our store because you didn't realize you could order something better for your money elsewhere)?"

"Do you have one of our club discount cards? No? Are you familiar with the benefits of the... I can shove it where, sir?"

Roy has a chapter in his book called "Cecil, Charlie, and Lagniappe," (Chapter 38). It is about the something extra. It's not about a customer walking away feeling like he and the shopkeep are "even." It's about the customer feeling like they got something extra... even if it cost more.

However, in graphic design, or as I like to think of what I do, media design, the designer (hopefully with the cooperation and support of the client) brings to the public or the audience (because those aren't necessarily the same) the image... the idea... the first taste of the experience.

The designer shapes the first interface with the experience of the product. He builds a frontline of the marketing effort.

So, what am I saying? Am I a marketer? Am I a salesman (after all)? Am I a graphic artist?

Yes.

I want to make my clients look good.

What will that look like?

The Zookeeper's Name

I'm testing out blogger's ability to post to my blog by emailing to
an account...

No. I'm not going to tell you the email address.

...and his name is Murphy.

title change.

It occurred to me yesterday that I mislabeled the name of the book. I think we had decided on "Profound Truths in Life"... or maybe it was "of Life."
I'm not certain.
Didn't want it to sound too much like Jack Handey.

Deep Thoughts On Life, Episode 1

My buddy Andrew and I have this idea... basically it's one of those fancy "library reading" books... short chapters, if you catch my meaning. Here's the idea for one chapter...

There is a procedure whenever you go to a doctor's office. You've all experienced it. It doesn't matter if it is a family doctor, a dentist, an eye doctor... this has happened to you.
You're sitting in the lobby, reading some magazine that's probably a couple of months old, when a nurse, or office assistant (who's probably in scrubs, anyway) opens "the door" and calls your name. They lead you down some hallway, open a door, and you go into the little room.

"The doctor will be right with you."

So, you sit there, looking around the room for something else to do, because you set the magazine down in the lobby.

A few minutes go by.

No doctor.

A few more minutes go by. You've been sitting there for half an hour (or more). You are all by your lonesome.

And the deep thought strikes:

If you pass gas in the little room:

a. someone will walk in within one minute;
b. they are going to know that it was you who dealt it.